Tag Archives: Mindset

Don’t Worry Be Happy

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I think there is much truth in the words of Bobby McFerrin:

In every life we have some trouble
But when you worry you make it double

As a rule, I tend not to worry about things. My mum won’t mind me telling you that she is a big worrier. I have often encouraged her to ask herself the following question when she finds herself worrying about something:

Can you do anything about it? If the answer is ‘yes’, great! Do something about it and then you won’t need to worry about it anymore. If the answer is ‘no’, well then there’s no point in worrying about it.

This has become a kind of mantra that I use and I know my mum has begun to worry less since asking herself this simple question.

Do you have any mantras that help you put a positive spin on a negative thought? Let me know in the comments section.

And if all else fails, have a sing-a-long with Bobby – it might at least help to lift your spirits.

Thanks for reading,

FFF

Throwback Thursday – Are You Being Nice to Yourself?

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In one of my early posts, I wrote about rewarding myself for my weight loss achievements.

These days, I think about the idea of a ‘reward’ a little bit differently (more about that in a future post) but I still believe in the importance of treating yourself, be that with something simple like a fancy cup of tea and half an hour with a good book, or something more indulgent like a spa day.

Self care is so important to your mental health so make sure you take some time this week to treat yourself.

What are you favourite ways to treat yourself? let me know in the comments section; I’m always looking for new ideas.

Thanks for reading,

FFF

Snap Out Of It!

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I wrote recently about the importance of working to make yourself happier and maintain a positive outlook. And whilst I definitely try to remain upbeat and optimistic, I am of course only human and am prone to a good ‘ole strop now and then,  as I’m sure my family would be only too keen to testify!

So finding ourselves in a bad mood is completely natural and happens to the best of us. We can’t change that. Things will happen in life which will wind us up. But what we can change is how we react when we find ourselves in a bad mood – we can choose stew on it or snap out of it.

Let’s take the first option: you can find yourself in a bad mood because the traffic was bad so you were late home from work, then you broke a nail and managed to superglue all of your fingers together which then made you even later for the gym than you had been before and you found yourself apoplectic with rage at the fact that you needed to hoover the stairs and landing because no one else was going to do it for you (true story). Choosing to stew on it tends to lead to you finding more things to become annoyed about and to you inevitably becoming even more annoyed. Before you know it, a minor irritation has become a full-force strop.

But what if we choose to snap out of it? Acknowledge that you’re feeling in a bad mood, for whatever reason, and do something to distract yourself from it – in much the same way as you would try to distract a toddler who was teetering on the edge of a tantrum.

Personally, I find doing something physical to be most effective: listening to upbeat music whilst doing housework is particularly effective for me (although, I’d avoid angry rap music as experience has taught me that this has the opposite of the intended effect) or doing some kind of exercise like going for a walk whilst listening to an entertaining podcast.

So the next time I find I’m late home from work, I’m going to get myself straight to the gym without ending up fuming about all of the household chores I’m going to need to do for the rest of my life. And I’m definitely going to leave the superglue alone.

 What strategies do you use to help yourself to snap out of it? Let me know in the comments section – I’m always looking for new strategies to try.

Thanks for reading,

FFF

Be Kind to Your Future Self

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One of the things I’ve previously struggled with when trying to create and, more importantly, maintain, new habits, it to keep the motivation going over the long term. I’ve often found that I’m good at getting motivated to begin a new habit, but once the initial wave of optimism fades, I find it becomes trickier to balance the demands of keeping the new habit going with the routines and unexpected happenings of daily life.

Recently, however, I’ve come across a new mantra courtesy of Gretchen Rubin and Liz Craft’s Happier podcast. In one of the episodes I listened to this summer (apologies, I can’t remember which one – note to self: jot things down in future!), Gretchen and Elizabeth talked about the idea of being kind to your future self. In short, there may be things you don’t really feel like doing in the moment but which, if you do do them, your future self will thank you for. For example, you might feel too tired after dinner to wash the dishes but if you leave them, when you wake up in the morning, you’ll wish you had just done them at the time. Therefore, thinking of your future self at the time you don’t feel like doing something can help to encourage you to do it.

I’ve been using this to my advantage in helping to stick to my healthy eating and exercise habits. There have been (several)times when I haven’t felt like preparing a healthy lunch or going to the gym, but I’ve stopped and thought about how grateful my future self will be that I did make the lunch or go to the gym. Similarly, I’ve employed this strategy when trying to avoid certain behaviours such as binge-eating or when tempted to indulge in more sweet treats than ar good for me. I’ve also found that picturing how that future self will look and feel – strong, lean, healthy and confident – when she’s thanking me for my actions has helped to boost the motivation to stick with my healthy habits.

 What are you going to do this week that your future self will thank you for? Let me know in the comments section.

Thanks for reading,

FFF

Who Doesn’t Want to be Happier?

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People often comment that I’m always happy and have a positive attitude. Don’t get me wrong, I have my off days and I’m more than capable of having a good old strop, as Mr FFF will confirm, but, on the whole, I do try to maintain a positive outlook.

The key word in that statement is ‘maintain’. It’s something I actively work on and have done for years. One of the ways I do this is by listening to podcasts that promote positive thinking. One of the podcasts I particularly love in this vein in the ‘Happier‘ podcast.

Hosted by Gretchen Rubin, a writer who studies happiness and habits, and her sister Elizabeth Craft, a TV writer and producer. Each week they discuss tips and strategies for how to be happier and provide ‘try it at home’ ideas. Despite living, and recording the podcast, on opposite coasts of the USA, Gretchen and Elizabeth clearly have a close and supportive relationship which shines through in each episode.

I personally love listening to their podcasts whilst doing the housework – it always makes a boring chore a little Happier.

Thanks for reading,

FFF

Make Small Changes

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When embarking on a new ‘diet’ or healthy living program, lots of people steam in and try to change everything all in one go. They tell themselves that they are not going to eat any ‘unhealthy’ food, they’re going to stop eating out and are going to go to the gym 5 days a week.

I think that these views are often fuelled by TV shows such as the biggest loser where we watch in admiration as people spend hours each day with a personal trainer and eat only healthful, nutritionally balanced meals and the weight of course falls off. But is this realistic for those of us who are not being paid to be on such a show? We have to remember that these participants are basically being paid to lose weight – it’s their job to do so.

Now, I don’t know about you, but I’m not being paid to live healthily and lose weight. I have to go out to work every day. And I haven’t got a team of chefs planning and preparing my meals.

When we try to change everything about our lifestyle in one go, it can often lead to overwhelm and can become unsustainable. So it’s often recommended that instead of overhauling every aspect of our lives, when trying to create new habits, we choose a few key areas in which to make small changes.

For me, this time around, that’s what I’ve been focusing on. I made the decision at the start of the summer to change just three things – I was going to start tracking my food, start exercising 3 times a week and stop eating out so often. Then I went on holiday and I decided that I was going to make a couple of small changes to how I would usually behave on holiday: I decided to continue going to the gym 3 times a week; to make the most of the healthy food options that were available and prepared for me rather than always choosing the most indulgent options; and to avoid drinking alcohol during the day.

I’m pleased to say that I’ve been sticking to these changes and have been seeing weight loss on the scales, reductions in my measurments and improvements in my fitness.

This weekend, I went out for dinner with friends for the first time since refocusing on my weightloss and health improvement goals. We went to a local steak house and again, I made some small changes to how I would normally approach a meal out: I decided I was only to going to have one glass of wine; we didn’t have starters although, if we were going to, I’d decided to order the salad option; I ordered the ‘lighter option’ version of steak accompaniments which saw my steak served with a delicious mixed salad instead of fries and fried onion loaf; then for dessert, I chose to order a peppermint tea with a mini-pud.

I left the restaurant feeling satisfied having enjoyed a delicous meal and great company, but I still felt in control. I also didn’t feel so stuffed that I spent the rest of the night feeling uncomfortable.

So, if you’re thinking about making big changes to your habits or lifestyle, maybe think again and just think about a couple of small changes you could make to get you started.

Have you decided to make any small changes to your habits or lifestyle? Let me know in the comments section.

Thanks for reading,

FFF

Change Your Story

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We like to think we know ourselves pretty well. We know what our favourite food is, what kind of music we like to listen to and the things we like to do in our spare time.

But sometimes, what we think we ‘know’ about ourselves, is no more than a belief we hold based on the stories we tell ourselves. Understanding this can help us to break old, unhelpful habits and foster new ones that will help us to achieve our goals.

For example, I’d always thought of myself as someone who was not very good at art. I’d never attempt to do anything arty and if faced with a situation as a teacher when I had to, I’d break out into a cold sweat. I always told people “I can’t draw a straight line with a ruler!”. But a couple of years ago, I decided that I was going to try new things and booked myself onto a painting workshop. I loved it and was really pleased with the painting I created and even started to recreate the techniques I’d been taught at home.  I started to tell myself that I could paint and I was keen and eager to practise and go to more workshops to learn more skills.

But how can this help with weight loss and adopting a healthier lifestyle? What stories do we tell ourselves?

Personally, for years I’ve told myself the following stories:

  • I love to eat big meals
  • I always finish everything on my plate
  • I’m addicted to chocolate
  • I don’t like exercise
  • I don’t have time to exercise
  • I can’t run
  • I don’t run

Well, that’s a whole load of convincing myself that I’m an ‘unhealthy’ person! But, as any of you who’ve read my recent post about completing the C25K program know, it turns out I can run if I put the time and effort in. So it looks like “the only time I would contemplate running is if I’d just come out of the hairdresser’s and it was raining,” story had to be changed.

This got me thinking about what other stories I tell myself I ought to work on changing.

“I love to eat big meals and always finish everything on my plate” – Well, actually, whilst I do love to eat tasty food, I don’t like that uncomfortable feeling of being stuffed to the gills as it spoils the meal. So I focus on enjoying the flavours and textures and only eat until I’m satisfied.

“I’m addicted to chocolate” – No I’m not. I really enjoy chocolate but it is not healthy for me to eat one (or more!) bars every day. So I only enjoy good chocolate in moderation.

“I don’t like exercise” – Exercise is important for my physical and mental health and well being and I enjoy the way I feel after I’ve exercised.

“I don’t have time to exercise” – I’ve got the same amount of time as everyone else has and lots of those people manage to exercise. I make exercise a priority because it is important for my health.

Now, I’m not saying I’m consistently telling myself only the new stories without the old stories creeping in sometimes, but I’m trying. And the more I tell myself these new stories, the more I believe them.

What stories, helpful or unhelpful, do you tell yourself? Let me know in the comments section.

Thanks for reading,

FFF

One Won’t Hurt

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Photo by kylie De Guia on Unsplash

I’m sure we’ve all used or heard this expression. I know I’ve definitely used it to justify:

  • having a cake
  • having a biscuit (even though I usually only eat those in twos)
  • having a glass of wine
  • not tracking a meal or snack
  • missing a workout

And it’s true. One won’t hurt. But if you’re having ‘one’ every day, eventually this adds up and has an impact. Darren Hardy talks more about this in his book ‘The Compund Effect’.

…decisions shape your destiny. Little, everyday decisions will take you either to the life you desire or to disaster by default.

The Compound Effect, Darren Hardy

I try to keep this principle at the forefront of my mind whenever I’m faced with making a decision about what to eat or whether to exercise or not. I ask myself a simple question,

“Will doing this take me closer to or further away from where I want to be?”

You can’t lose weight while you’re on holiday!

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Or so I’d always told myself. But it turns out I was wrong (Ssshhh! Don’t tell Mr FFF – my official line is that I’m always right!). On my recent 14 night cruise, I somehow managed to lose 2lb! And no that’s not a typo. I actually lost weight whilst on a cruise where food and drink were available 24 hours. I’m still in shock. Last year, on an almost identical cruise, I put on about 7lb.

So how did I do it? Did I deprive myself and eat only lettuce leaves and plain, grilled fish whilst sipping water? No. But I did change my mindset towards the way I ate whilst I was away.

On holidays past, I would pretty much eat whatever I wanted, whenver I wanted and would justify it to myself by saying that I deserved it, after all I was on holiday. The thing is, for me, as for many others, it always seems to take longer to lose weight than it does to put it on. And, I’m lucky enough to go away at least a couple of times each year. I realised that my ‘enjoy it while you can’ attitude effectively meant that I was only ever gaining and losing holiday weight.

This realisation, coupled with my latest attempt to lose the weight for good, lead me to review my mindset towards holiday eating before I even packed my suitcase. I knew that there would be wall-to-wall food and drink available if I wanted it. I also knew that, while lots of the options available are at the less healthy end of the spectrum, there would also be plenty of healthier stuff too. So I decided to make the most of having healthy food freshly prepared for me at each meal.

I mainly ate omlettes, bircher muesli and fresh fruit for breakfast. For lunch I would generally load up on the various different salads offered in the buffet and add some chicken or fish to them. At dinner, I generally opted for the fish or chicken options and avoided anything that came in a creamy sauce. I didn’t eat like a fitness model all the time though. I had a dessert every night – but I didn’t have a dessert every lunchtime, just once or twice. I also ate breakfast pastries a couple of times, but not every day.

We also chose not to get the all inclusive drinks package on this cruise. There were several factors that played into this but the main one being in the past when we had a package, we sometimes felt like we were drinking just for the sake of it. I still drank wine with dinner almost every night and enjoyed several cocktails, but it was in moderation.

I think that exercising regularly also really helped. I went to the gym on every sea day as well as the one port day when we’d decided to only get off the ship for a couple of hours. In the past, I’ve had good intentions about exercising whilst on holiday but they’d usually stayed at that – intentions rather than actions. This time, I’d decided in advance that I would continue to get up early and go to the gym before breakfast. This would then give me the whole day to lounge around or take part in the activities offered. Although there were a couple of times when I was tempted just to lie in bed, I reasoned that, once I’d been to the gym, I could spend the rest of the day lying on my balcony reading if I so wished. Exercising first thing also helped me to make healthier choices with my food as I always feel like eating more healthily when I’m exercising regularly.

Better than the view from my local gym.
Proof that I was actually there!

The funny thing was, I didn’t feel deprived at all. I felt lucky that there was such delicious, healthy food being prepared for me for every meal. And I enjoyed being up early and in the gym when there were only a few other people about. Sitting on my balcony afterwards with a cup of tea and enjoying the peace and quiet was also something I really looked forward to each day.

So, it turns out I’m not always right; it is totally possible to go on holiday, enjoy yourself and still lose weight.

Thanks for reading,

FFF

How do yo holiday? Do you follow your usual eating and exercise habits or do you use the time to do as you please? Let me know in the comments section.

Let’s Get This Party Started!

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The results of my first weigh-in of 2017 and what I’m going to do about it.personal-record-cover

Start Weight: 13st 12.5lbs

Goal Weight: 10st 12.5lbs

Pounds to get rid of: 42

Mini-goal: Lose weight this week!

So I had the ‘dreaded’ first post-Christmas weigh-in.  I say, dreaded, but actually, I was looking forward to it.  As I explained in my earlier post, this year, I’ve been really excited to get back to focusing on where I want my body to be.

Despite that, I must admit I was still a bit apprehensive about stepping on to the scales to find out what I’m currently weighing in at.  I can’t say I’m happy with my weight, but, importantly, I’ve decided not to give myself a hard time about it.  There’s no point.  What’s done is done.  I can’t go back and change it.  But what I can do, is change what I do from now on.

I’d like to lose about 3st.  As it’s been a long time since I was down near this kind of weight, this is only a loose target at this stage.  As I get closer to it, I’ll reassess my goal.  I’ve decided to think about it in terms of ‘pounds to get rid of’ rather than ‘stones to lose’ for 2 reasons:

1) I don’t want to lose weight – psychologically, I might try to find it again! (as my good friend Darren at Team Achieve explained in one of his blogs some time ago)

2) I don’t know why but 3st seems to be a lot more unwieldy to me that its equivalent in pounds.

As I restart my weight loss journey, I’m going to be focusing on 3 main areas each week to help me lose weight: eating healthily, moving more and developing a positive mindset.

In the past, I’ve usually only focused on the eating and moving side of things but I’ve been ww-weekly-card-week-1doing a lot of work around mindset during the past 8 months or so and I’ve come to realise just how important it is to take care of this aspect of ourselves.  As I’d already decided to work on these three areas, I was pleased to find out at my meeting last night that Weight Watchers will also be focusing on all three of these areas during the coming months.

Eating Healthily

I know from my past successes that meal planning is a vital aspect of making healthy eating choices.  As I’ve been off work for two and a half weeks for Christmas, I thought this would be the ideal time to get back in to planning my meals.

However, unexpected things came up and I found that every time I scheduled some time to plan my meals for week 1, something happened that meant it got pushed down the list of priorities.  By 30th December, I was starting to panic about this slightly.  I’d decided that I wanted to shop on New Year’s Eve, so that I was ready to make healthier choices straightaway on January 1st, and I still hadn’t had chance to sit down and plan my meals.

Then I noticed an email in my inbox telling me about the BBC Good Food Healthy Diet Plan for January.  I had a quick look and, although I didn’t have time to sit and work out the Smart Points values for each of the meals, it was clearly all fresh, healthy food options with all recipes and even a shopping list provided.  Winner, winner, healthy dinner! And breakfast and lunch too!  So I printed the shopping list off and dragged Mr FFF round Asda feeling rather smug with my trolley full of curly kale as everyone else was stocking up with party food.

I didn’t fully stick to the plan on January 1st or yesterday – that had never been my bbc-good-food-amended-plannerintention – and I only got round to working out all the Smart Points values today.  What I’ve done is to work out the Smart Points values for each meal.  I then actually cut the meals out and rearranged them to better suit our schedule for the week.  As I didn’t use the lunches on day 1 or 2, I’ve also ‘bumped’ them to next week, so I’m already ahead of the game there.  Get in!

So far, all of the meals I’ve tried have been delicious.  I’ll definitely be making them again.  The only thing that tripped me up a bit is that I’ve had to work out the Smart Points using the recipe builder on the Weight Watchers website rather than using the nutritional information provided with the recipes.  This is to take account of those foods which are ‘zero’ pointed (hence the scribbled out and re-written points values on my planner!).

 

Moving More

Now, I’m not the biggest fan of exercise.  I know it’s really important and really good for you both physically and mentally.  And I know that when I get into it, I do enjoy it.  But I’m definitely not a natural gym bunny.  I’ve had several periods in my life when the only contribution to my weight loss efforts that has been made by my gym membership is that I’ve had less money to spend on chocolate and wine!  However, I’m determined to move more.

I’ve learnt from experience, and the words of others much wiser than I, that, if I say I’m going to exercise every day, or even every other day, it ain’t gonna happen.  Not for much longer than the first week or so anyway!  So instead, I’m making a much smaller, easier to achieve commitment: I’m going to exercise twice a week.

I’m going to go to a yoga class and I’m going to go swimming.  I’ve chosen these activities because they are activities that I enjoy and I’m actually looking forward to going to.  I haven’t arranged to go with anyone as I know that the first time they can’t make it, I’ll use that as an excuse not to go myself.  I have mentioned my plans to a couple of friends who’ve said they want to exercise more but it’s a case of if they decide to tag along, great.  I’ve treated myself to a gorgeous new swimming costume and a new hoodless zip-up top.  Believe it or not, one of the things that has put me off going to yoga in the colder weather before is that all of my long-sleeved exercise tops had hoods which are extremely irritating when you’re trying to concentrate on your downward dog let me tell you!  So now I’ve got no excuses.

 

Positive Mindset

I’m going to continue reading a book I’ve begun using to help me to develop a more positive attitude to my weight loss efforts.  So far I’ve found it very enlightening but I’ll review it fully once I’ve finished it.

I’m also going to take time to interact with others on social media to share tips, experiences and motivation.  If you want to join in, please like me on Facebook or follow me on Twitter using the links on the right.

I think I’ve rambled on more than enough for one post.  Sorry if it has been a bit long-winded today, but I’m honestly brimming with enthusiasm for getting back on track.

Thanks for reading,

FFF

What are you planning on doing to help you on your weight loss journey this week?